Dream 2024.09.14 Fri IRL Venn Diagram interlocking bangles analogy health hits
Dream 2024.09.14 Fri
Fly over German Town SH driveways model train teahouse alley new discovery hide. Lanes my hood becomes land on feet, picnic grass, hang with lovely young women In kitchen, her nipple is showing we hug young men join in MFM MFFM hugs cuddle some women have blue gray white painted bikinis on their naked torso as they prep for a daytime fest or beach party I want to go with women pack their clean canteen with variety of juices they leave. I grab a full glass of juice from the sink they’re gone I grab another from the counter are satisfying I check the fridge another fridge third and fourth fridge
Then finally there, so mini fridge I open the outer door exposes at plastic inner door shelf for additional cooling pressure release door open for third door fourth fifth sixth mini shells of doors finally opening to an inner Goldmine of 16 lightly colored juices dispensers I choose the middle lower larger reservoir. I grab a 8 ounce glass from the drying rack of mini mostly 4 ounce glasses. I fill with juice from the center lower reservoir. It now becomes a huge 20 ounce glass. I drink of that softly colored juice.
These women were going to a party on skyline or a party on the beach on the grass somewhere daytime festival I wanted to join them
IRL I’m dying of thirst while dying of starvation as my food sources dwindle yesterday I’m on my last of 10 water bottles and my last brown cow leader of plain milk yogurt.
Last night cold closed curtain pulled light blue poly moving blanket to chest. Then unfolded 1x
Last night though a lot Hawk Paula Harbin pool
Maggie Arbelou Chicago wished Harbin Gaia
Wished not sure no plans yet how bout you
Wished Deirdre Corrigan Harbin aft Earthdance
Wished Deirdre Corrigan at HeeBeeGB healers
IRL morning I pulled the box of liters of tomato juice, creams soup and chicken broth out of my foot well and stuck my legs into the straight leg foot well for the first time in two weeks
IRL see Convo with Emily who said it’s important to sleep with straight legs
IRL my knees have had severe pain as I sleep in a sitting position on my back hips, 90°, knees, 90°
IRL knees, chronic pain, heals toes, sides of feet, often sore from pressing against car, back window stuff on hard pad, acro mat black from Acacia pad
This morning moved box broth put leg, straight, straddle, knee, pillow of IKEA vinyl, blue bag, sleeping bag to and turned all night to relieve lower back pain, L5 S Had this dream of topless women, prepping juice for day, fest beach, party, outdoor music, renegade hula, hoops into group 3 women man fed back vertical, rolling hula hoop just before they left
IRL want to communicate to ILM that her life is not possible while guv is forcing mRNA jobs on her
IRL develop timeline us govt health insults
1989 RFK IDs Autism spike food allergies new
1998 Patrick IDs chemtrails
2001 911 govt clearly despise sheeple WTC NYC
2019 Cov19 2020 mRNA lockdown
AJ ref Reuters most polio comes from polio jab
Dr Greger all cancer came by animal husbandly
1984 Dr Fauci describe intro AIDS gay HepB jab
1980s CSPI urged avoid lard animal palm coco
1970s most human bodies sexy lean healthy tan
1960s FBI divides MLK SCLC cointelpro schism
1960s FBI IDs black white alliance hippy antiwar
1967 summer of love Haight Ashbury GGpark SF
1969 WoodStock NYPD pigs airplane seed clouds rain wet muddy hippies
Chronological list timeline us govt health insults
1901 Rockefeller Institute HiJack medicine
rockefeller medicine corbett report
1913 Federal Reserve JP Morgan skips Titanic
1917 JP Morgan Rockefeller finance WWI
1918 JPS Bolshevik Revolution HiJack Russia
1945 Atomic Bomb waste Fluoridate Drink Water
1947 Balfour declaration. 1814 Napoleon Rothschild
1960s FBI divides MLK SCLC cointelpro schism
1960s FBI IDs black white alliance hippy antiwar
1967 summer of love Haight Ashbury GGpark SF
1969 WoodStock NYPD pigs airplane seed clouds rain wet muddy hippies Vietnam POW HC
1967 US govt Meningitis chemtrails SF SFbay
1967? USNAVY seed clouds bio agents Alameda
1970s most human bodies sexy lean healthy tan
Dr Greger all cancer came by animal husbandly
1984 Dr Fauci describe intro AIDS gay HepB jab
1980s CSPI urged avoid lard animal palm coco
1989 RFK IDs Autism spike food allergies new
1998 chemtrails aerosol pathogen air clouds
2001 911 govt clearly despise sheeple WTC NYC
2019 Cov19 2020 mRNA lockdown event 201
AJ ref Reuters most polio comes from polio jab
2014 Us proxy war o overthrow Ukraine Maiden
2022 NATO surround Russia w “peaceful nukes”
2024.09.13 NATO discuss Nuke Russia Via UK
Dream 2024.09.13 Fri
Silver 1/2 rds tubes 1M wrong count panic wake.
Dream 2024.09.12 Thu
Fence wood board sections
She told me she wanted to plant trees at her new house like her old house so I asked her to show me her old house on Google Maps so I could see the trees she did not want to
Dream 2024.09.12 Thu
White car Loma Prieta
Dream 2024.09.11 Wed B dig 4drains pebble concrete patio discover drain dig tree
Dream 2024.09.11 Wed A dig sand crabs backyard upper lower patio water fill
Dream 2024.09.10 Tue Forest floor stage black metal aluminum covered forest fire kept igniting
Could not put out or find
Dream 2024.09.10 Tue
Car HP engine power red orange lines graph
Dream 2024.09.10 Tue
Forest floor festival stage
Dream 2024.09.09 Mon she in crowd of party we’re together but separate in100
She’s within a wall of 100 people we are a date
In a crowd almost like we know we’re together but noone elsedoes party couldbe fuzzyPhillippe
Dream 2024.09.08 Sun
Gold coins hidden in Bible
I discovered the gold coins hidden in the paper of the Bible and inches of reams of old Bible stock paper which I set aside that auction on upper patio among black lacquer, varnish, chest antique furniture also for sale
I tried to show the paper stock to other people without giving away that I had found the coins
Coins should have been found earlier, but we’re overlooked by previous parties on previous dates both within the concrete walls of the safe and within the Bible
Dream 2024.09.08 Sun
Gold coins hidden in safe
Old building in concrete at auction upper patio I scrape with my hand the heavier tiny fractional AE cluster bottom of cookie tin
Dream 2024.09.07 Sat B I had stuff in garage so moving stuff from left to right would be simpler than it could have been.
IRL North half better more space. South half less good had to share door. Garage 3/4 empty both sides amazingly little stuff and simple to move. Much shelf pre built a la John
IRL some Parallel to to JTH offered whole House side of garage. Walk would be on far side.
Dream 2024.09.07 Sat A I asked my mom if I could move back into corner bed not mid bed. 3 black cats Lance Abbie Nick. Mom yes.
Would be say to move as she only had 1 lat file 1 desk
cats were indoor outdoor but mostly stayed indoors
Cats again were 3 black furry blobs circles.
Cats passive lay in circles could be pet. That’s all
I looked at window boxes for differences
IRL corner 2’ more. 11x10 v 10x9 or 13/10 v 11/10 or 12/11 v 12/9? None of these sound right all data gone. 12/13 12/11? Window box longer.
Sad part is then I was measuring and mapping Rays downstairs RWC room but sad comparison
RWC sucks depressing hot no trees no shade
Dream 2024.09.06 Fri 3 AbbieCat Nik lay corner bedroom Liv room TV
I pet her just to touch her as I have not for the longest time
Dream 2024.09.06 Fri 2
BackYard party beanbag lounging comfy sit
IRL L5S abject pain Fri Sep6
Dream 2024.09.06 Fri 1 river bed cooking knife underwater scene2 tools
Magnet attached to toolbox und house backyrd
Dream 2024.09.05 Thu 2 Chris Sia Campbell
Chris wanted to be alone said Marlo the black guy who I should’ve remembered his name. Chris wandered off into the camper woods.
Dream 2024.09.05 Thu 1 Fuzzy Filipe Camp Destin
I tried to pee in the bathroom with my penis above my pants belt without removing my pants but it didn’t work and I wet my underwear. Maybe my sock had to change my sock which is OK cause I need it get wet and change my pants anyway also, there was a swimming pool so swim trunks got wet anyway it didn’t matter.
Dream 2024.09.0
Dream 2024.09.04 Wed 4
Ammo storage Tyler durden
SF he walked me towards his storage unit using how much extra ammo he had and didn’t know what to do with it and how cheap and affordable his storage was
Dream 2024.09.04 Wed 3
SFyard morph? TargetShoot
3 of us they shot yet my mag on wall rack had green, shiny stone pebbles go go
Dream 2024.09.04 Wed 2
up anchor alarm shipyard
SF we were exploring buildings, which may have been mostly cargo containers in a yard lot
But somebody accidentally pressed the button that said, anchor up this triggered an alarm and response so we learned button bad
Dream 2024.09.04 Wed 1
igneous sedimentary meta
igneous sedimentary conglomerate I was deep in the Earth in a cave, magma or volcanic origin
Emerging a lot of water, mud was eminent
We group our team struggle to erect post of lumber timber plywood, huge wooden columns, to hold back the flood with hammer and nails
As we retreated to fallback positions to survive, what was coming
Salvaging, grabbing as many posts studs beams rafters as we could to save, and hold onto, as all would be lost, swept away by flood mudslide
Hi ground mountain
Dream 2024.09.03 Tue
Dream 2024.08.31 Fri 1d
AirBnB water element now
As Venice or Tiburon Belvedere
Dream2024.08.31Fri1csbed
Hill lot now has beds like Airbnb or resort several beds available. I choose one while observing another with bodies under blankets in motion I am expecting company. This unimproved lot could be in portrayal Hill they can.
Several times I walked up and down by where guy who helped us find car keys was packing up after flea market closed
IRL this is very similar to macro Adobe lot. I explored finding tow cables hooks rings type stuff north base portal by 17th Anheuser Bush Varo.
Dream2024.08.31Fri1bsflot plexiglasscirclechorusstage
Again alone in dirt lot flea market space I pick up Circle plexiglass sheet which may be your station visor field for science experiments lab I observe tiny miniature seating area for students stepped stage amphitheater for choral practice with many concrete stairsteps and interrupted spaces or students Lexi glass could be a table top or a instrument stand it’s like an amusement park or playground amphitheater for Montessori school
Dream 2024.08.30Fri1SFlot
Car keys lost fleamarketguy
Finds car keys I ask what brand is signal locator is he says homemade device black, dual antenna, bulky mount construction handheld large
This, after previous problem logging keys in car, seeking cop or security guard for coathanger
Sprinter Van DEF white Ford
I saw a sprinter van parked, so I wanted to ask the guy what year was if he had DEF explaining that I wanted one without death maybe he had a Ford but I wouldn’t have asked him about DEF unless it was a sprinter Ford only has gas
Ask him about the years explain my years
2024.08.29 Haiti LucyStern
Dream 2024.08.29 Thu 2
My left chest tattoo dark black broad ink functioned as health monitor interface for vitals and input 2-way feedback interface
Vertical design 2” wide 8” tall 4 5 or 6 2x2” characters down my left breast T5-down to lowest rib
Dream 2024.08.29 Thu 1.2 bike helmet hood aero cone hat bus tour cycle rent group
One woman looked young, cute and hyper geeky with a pencil that can face and cap of a bike helmet cute and sexy and nerdy, almost figured, pitiful, then behind her a guy wore a super helmet cone aerodynamic hood, a kin to Spaceballs, but colored with logos racing blue red black white design abstract this bus tour top double-decker morphed into all four of the street dreams
Dream 2024.08.29 Thu 1.1
Venezuela gang cash heist creek bed st garage old man victim cash theft mugged by gang
Dream 2024.08.29 Thu 1.3 fern grotto Berkeley moss fashion swap table shade beret woman pig nose counselor from TCvillagetun
Sitting in my cozy seat in the Canyon alley of a bookshop seat. My glass of water spilled dripping onto my clay pot vivarium like my mom would build clay water drip from one planter to the next and succulents ferns and moss clover would grow.
Serene, relaxing, Bohemian hippie, soft, Berkeley digs I looked the woman laying down in the alcove of the bookstore lounge.
beret woman pig nose snout
Her nose, while still human extended an extra inch out beyond normal. Unattractive to me longest I’ve ever seen on a woman everything else was normal about her. Morphed a little.
I asked her if she was a counselor as I walked over to her.
She seemed to be a social worker and I might’ve inquired about if he was a psychiatrist or a psychologist she was neither, but a social worker
IRL I have asked a librarian about lawyers or legal referral services within library. She told me that is not offered here but is offered in Redwood City, Marshall branch and Santa Clara library.
fashion swap table shade
I had noticed a bark shades, rebound, looking glasses, and a purple, soft large beret on the table near me for sometime then later, upon one of my returns, it was gone, perhaps replaced by something else, and I saw a sign on the table and somebody warn me don’t leave cell phone on the table. Then I realized it was a fashion trade swap area. Then I noticed other articles fashion and a bunch of glasses I tried to check to see if some might be in reading glasses but yes they were somewhat yet? Prescription? Then those glasses moved in morphed into silly Mardi Gras frames useless embarrassing that a guy near me had just set down several sets. Guess he was a burner.
Dream 2024.08.28 Wed
3 tall white porcelain prism
Dream 2024.08.28 Wed
Irl pampas grass baker
Dream 2024.08.27 Tue2 ofc bldg sm biz Silicon Valley Eve
I sat and share an observed guests arrive at school or office evening class young women, college age arrived. I observed from my comfy parka lounger padded throne.
Morphed
Dan
Floated brine shrimp inch size fish in paper plate on water floated downstream seagulls would attack floating plate spilling contents freeing most fish
Keystone Floormat Hospitality hotel or dining est
Woman host gave hospitality to guests and myself
As I sat in my comfy chair, observing, I worried about my beard and green thick shirt, giving me away as homeless
IRL I worry about the same at store and Street
So I didn’t even go back to PAAF Sun aft gd Sat
Dream 2024.08.27 Tue1sex, missionary then Left Spoon RL party w JL @ CL
She invited by gesture and body language
I slowly lay between her legs
Slowly approached her lips with mine
Slowly lightly touched kissed cunnilingus
Unknown duration transition to mission slowlygently softly for a time
She said let’s try… transitioned slowly to left spoon
IRL I have not had sex this decade. MegaSad
Dream 2024.08.26 Mon fail
Dream 2024.08.25 Sun cat Star Wake cat 9am 2nd cat
IRL To wake me up. In list of first.
Dreams of cats waking me up have been intermittent and interspersed yet to have been hard wake ups since star news 40 weeks old since last Sunday seven days ago photo sight.
First dream labeling J as threat was this summer after two years of dreams with J as friend or neutral.
Dreams of gold waking me up have been interspersed throughout these two years
Dream 2024.08.25 Sun 1A
Hotsprings nu rock water air steam most warmth alone
Venue design Rock stone Canyon, Hot Springs, ascending narrowing, warm steamy, Misty, inviting, comfy, safe quiet no people at first at open of dream, just desolate myself in nature, elements of rock, water, air, steam warmth
Dream 2024.08.25 Sun Cherry Flamingo Fluffer
Suzanne L kiss my cheek and whispered in my ear, even as I receive feedback some less favorable from women of my history
Dream 2024.08.25 Sun 1B
Krista Harbin Dildos Lupin
Lupin dildo had most damage cut gone
4 dildos total rep V three events previous parties at venue. Four different length dildos remained after heads, cut off or tip. Representing significance of cut removed from head of dildo representing injuries at each party.
Three events listed at this venue each had a name of event and varying length of tip head of builder removed, representing injury, sustained at that previous party
Yet none of those events sustained as much injuries as the Lupen dildo, which was pink sized
Assorted colors/pink green blue
Dripping semen from tips
Remarkably unusual for me as a lifelong hypochondriac semen Phobe
Makes the dream even more worthy of inspection
This dildo sequence occurred after finding/meeting Krista at this new hot tub via
New venue, new woman
Yet before cherry flamingo, Fluffer, Susan L
Kiss my cheek, and stood by my side
As I read less flattering reviews of my behavior from women in community
This dream actually then fairly clearly represents a vivid model of display of my hypochondriac fears age 10-50 juxtaposed with my affect on community. Post 2012. Sobering.
Dream 2024.08.25 Sun
Krista Harbin meet Arrive
New Hot Springs similar to Harbin. Canyon
Much to unpack as I recall dream content
Though no earth, no trees, just boulder, rock micro Canyon, sheer rock, walls floor, other smooth round boulder rocks, 1 foot and 2 foot in diameter, forming transitions between levels of hot spring venue, warm light, airy, comfy, safe, solitary
I was the only human, and I was OK temporarily momentarily alone
Then enter Krista, or more likely Kristen
Possibly Keisha Kesha Nordic sounding though likely Kristen
Kristen love interest, new flirting warm
I want to be with her and am in first few minutes of meeting her in new space while moving about while having just emerged from this upper micro Canyon of Hot Springs
Into
Perhaps a dining hall or common area of the space where
A
Dildos display 4 previous party cuts
Take away. Yes, cuts or injuries at previous parties yet none so bad as Lupin.
IRL I just messaged woman on FL Lupin does not hold a candle flame to Harbin. ILoveMushrooms
My Metaphor awkward unclear poorly chosen
B
Cherry flamingo Fluffer kiss my cheek whisp ear
C
I read reviews by some women which may be somewhat audible or viewable witness ball by intimate crowd of knowing while I read or review,
Receive Judgement unflattering casts dispersion on my character
IRL sat PAAF event LOW I receive vast legal help advice from AZPl yet I am broken, depressed, suicidal done, 2.5 years into being broken and not caring, damaged lost lack will to stand up :( 2.5 years limbo sleep as only task or goal on top of food sustenance as only other goal on top of miserable, futile, seemingly impotent communications or response from JF BFD,NJ lawyers
Dream 2024.08.24 Sat 2
12” EP Japan scritti Politti C
12” EP Covers Manny, several beige bent, partially crumpled such but clearly no vinyl inside on the table I observed, as he sorted through half dozen alone on the table. I noticed the table was vibrating and moving across the room floor. It was the vibration of the EP music base.
Floor vibrated table solid across floor
After
CDs fell out of loft wood flr B
After young man swept naked, CDs, wood floor loft one CD got stuck in the wood floor bevel like a VHS tape protective cover would get stuck open or closed
I helped free the stuck CD and flicked it to the floor as all the other CDs had dropped yet this was not just any other CD. This was his favorite CD in a paper sleeve red characters. I fetch the CD.
ABC
Dream 2024.08.24 Sat 1 a
I dropped off two large stacks of fruits and sweaters on coat hangers, each thick pile
But I had second thoughts, because some of these were good thick, nice beautiful sweaters that would have high, utility and cold
So I told the man not yet on these and both tiles with my two hands
He pile on the right, so I tried to take it back from him and we ended up in a physical pushing match
Very unusual both and dream and in IRL
Morphed change of space
We were also outside yard buses junkyard storage space fuck
Morphed
Character elements of Raw Jacob Canada, goose Baker Beach, raw food Jacob
IRL 2024.08.23 Fri Anna red
Flag dumped me in text message after she sent me. Fw.org.uk article deep fake AI CRAM
IRL 2024.08.23 Fri Nik Red
Flag. Short fuse. Temper flare. Second time I asked Nick not to speak loudly by gate before 9 AM.
Nick was upset. He said it wasn’t me. I said it was you. He said he knows me I said I saw you.
Several cycles of this, just like a week ago
Nik would say. It was somebody else.
Nicholas defensive both times, denying he was talking
Nick even asked me who he was talking to the first week
I said he was talking to himself
Nick denied he was talking to himself
Nick said none of us are supposed to be here!
Then on one cycle ANGER
Nick said how did you know it was ME?
Nick said how did you know me? Were you watching me?
If you’re watching me, I’m gonna call the police!
Anger
Nick clenched his raised R fist in front of his face seething with anger. Tense arm torso face!
Scary.
I had never seen this before short fuse Nik.
IRL 2024.08.18? Sun Emily
Emily Note Monday. “I want to be alone” after
10/11pm-3am talk on wood bench albums movie
Note suggesting my autism may have missed her sleepy cue of dropped eye contact. 1/2 true.
I had once noticed her dropped iContact yet I
Failed to comprehend, meaning, or sleepy. :(
Dream 2024.08.23 Fri
Sara V Healdsburg Heavens Florida SLO Camp
IRL SaraV is and my dream or triggering me as in my dream I reminded myself too
OK half out of my dream I reminded myself to remember a term phrase that would remind me about the dream.
Now it’s 10:15 AM and I can’t remember the dream but I feel the visual of myself walking on a bed of rocks out and I feel this warmth of woman had a very close, but I cannot now get my first book into the dream
The single detail that would open the door and let the whole dream recover in my memory
Words are long look how long this paragraph is just to faintly touch on one visual point of reference
Essence of dream was walking, barefoot on pebbles, as if dry stream bed, wishing not to hit my forehead on
? Relates to my lifelong, wish that I had walked with Maggie to the stream That we may find a private picnic spot
To my wish that I had invited her to Hot Springs, that she may join me south
Nik woke me 9 Ch truck beep
Dream 2024.08.22 Thu
Dream 2024.08.21 Wed B Angel kissed my L Cheek IRL STAR Found 40Weeks
Dream 2024.08.21 Wed A worm tube
I was sitting on wood chips at a freeway on rent intersection 280 Sandhill and an island and saw a paper tube like paper straw picked it up noticed there was something inside like a wheat moth larva but larger like drinking straw size squeezed it and felt there was a critter in there Might’ve popped it put it back down to stay clean
Look through wood chips to see if their other worm cocoons almost like a marine biology creature would construct its own house out of grains of sand and secretion glue
Dream 2024.08.21 Wed B
Dream Lost. Having trouble recall. May have had to do with glass bead, glass balls, or Orby‘s in the back of a hatchback car.
IRL Anna David Pen Cream 1-5T20OneTasteOMFolsom
MidSummerNIghtsDream 2010 Healdsburg
Shara Bday Party Project One
Dream 2024.08.20 Tue1 burningman, parking lot party,
IRL burning man starts in five days. Last night I recalled two years ago during Jay’s torture JTH, J fuck VH, when I was banging on the wall above my pillow, in anger that I was not prepping for or at burning man this year. thinking I was covered. by noise of gas, powered chainsaw and trimmer at 19 next-door, but that only covered the outside noise.
JT could hear me from downstairs and banged broomstick on ceiling per usual
I was talking to a guy who was staging for burning man
I was looking at the piles of junk materials stage for future or past burning man event in this empty parking lot past or future venue, in the middle of nowhere country remote location
That was empty of people now, but would be a full on party in the past or future
IRL
Yesterday at 7 PM I gave potato chips, churros and cookies
also
10 bags of very expensive rice, Lundberg Farms, black rice and multi colored rice, grains lumber, and lar bags of expensive rice to
Bob
Add Peninsula creamery truck storage lot north
910 Emerson, BTW, Channing Addison
Bob said it was a truck maintenance slot meaning he fixed tires there for the trucks
I asked him if he means they debated and take the tires off the rims there and he said no they send them off to some guys
So I didn’t bug him or bother more about it but I said my mind he’s just giving me a copper story it’s a storage lot and he’s just hanging out there with all the RVs and trucks that are parked maybe two of the vehicles upfront are running and pulled out of the lot but 90% of the vehicles in the three lots are dead two of the Michaels milk trucks have clover Stornetta paintings on the side
Berkeley Farms 2yrsClosed
Bought by another dairy they want to expand up
Berkeley Farms owner closed up, retired moved
Dream 2024.08.20 Tue1X inept funny gang shoot from car roof on hilltop down at other people, but humorously 2nd scene was w shotgun no range
1X denotes after 1 separate
Not sure what dream this was after it was not connected to burning man parking lot dream
But something else I can’t recall so 1X def 1X
The silliness or humorous of the bee movie or comedy scene was that the hilltop perch was too far away from whatever seen below people and especially the second gun was a shotgun 12 gauge wooden pump action, so for sure couldn’t reach down below
2c? Vitamin supplement food sample woman, sitting bottom edge of parking lot under balcony of dumpsters after boogers after booger snot
Boogers snot came after two dumpsters dream
These two dumpsters located at the bottom of apartment complex or dorm complex three walls of a square parking lot side
Where somebody was looking for something so I looked for to see if I could find something in one of those dumpsters
Could be they needed assigned backing for a garage sale or just some proper piece of utility item
Dream 2024.08.20 Tue2B? I am suddenly picked up and given shoulder ride by
Strong, young, sexy woman, on to booger snot balcony
In parking lot same. Maybe she walks me to edge parking lot where I find health food samples eat sample looks like a different color cornflake or potato chip but it’s a health supplement.
Attractive young saleswoman as a gig for green festival or whole life, Expo or tradeshow with Anne, retail containers similar to Trader Joe’s green drink
As she
Prepares to read off ingredients to either myself, And or one other individual in attendance, and or a tiny group of people
I say
Booger snot and humor harmlessly and well received by her and or the crowd
That’s all just a dream, but here at morph into finding the metal coathanger maybe that more into the cookies dream
Now IRL
I am unsure
Open my eyes five or 10 minutes ago and grab phone
Weather this morph into metal coathanger into cookies
Or
Whether wooden coathanger permit into metal coder code hanger cream, which morph to cookies at Safeway
Although cookies at Safeway table at registers also seems to have
Morphed from
Wooden termite be rat
Dream 2024.08.20 Tue3 balcony dumpsters, find two with booger snot
Dream 2024.08.20 Tue 4C I eat cookies from stash paper covered as in a paper wrap at a burger joint
But the home shelf, kitchen cookie tray bowl morph into a plastic round 6 inch store cookie container tub
As I sit in the table the scene
Morphs from a domestic living room or home apartment, young 20s roommates into sitting at a table upfront, and a Safeway or store near the registers with a group of half dozen other people
I got there coming from a metal close hanger, which I was fiddling with metal coathanger, extending dowel to retract it as it was extending two or 3 feet into the aisle as I fiddle with these two metal coat hangers I walked over to the cookie
Table where my party had gotten up and was ready to go and leave the store and I don’t know where they were but I needed to meet them back at the car to finish my ride
SO
I worried that they might leave without me and wondered if they would text or call me
Then
I worried that they might be wanting to text me to buy more cookies as I had eaten half of their stash but then they also worried that if they told me to buy more cookies would add five minutes to
The five minutes that they might tell me I had to meet them at their car
But
Then I worried they might not know which word to use as they could say. We’re leaving in five minutes at 5:05 or
Or
Should they say we’re leaving at the end of 505?
SO
They were worrying about whether they should leave at the beginning or the end of the actual minute stated
Ok
So this is fascinating, trivial in content for a dream
Dream 2024.08.20 Tue4a woman stands sidewalk, bottom driveway night? Waiting for her car person or ride
I’m standing in my driveway noticing her
Dream 2024.08.20 Tue4b Bsuper honeybee, rat crawling out of termite hole in wooden coathanger laying on ground by front Porsche
Honeybee, rat, mouse, crawling out of wood, coathanger, crawling out of on front porch driveway under tall wooden coat, hanger rack, mount warning, dove, resting, nook, wooden lattice, shelter, built attached to front porch near light installed by adult man, friend of family or myself, and then cut off by hacksaw saw all removing a large sheet of plywood, but when this third person man, friend of family cut off the plywood sheet vertical the saw destroyed half of the wooden mount for the bird perch assembly
Dream 2024.08.19 Mon woman in lap beanbag
Ask me if there will be drums Monday night as if this were a question about Monday after burning man so I asked the DJ and part B of dream room a DJ has where he’s sitting in the hall has several adapters on the corner of the carpet floor maybe lightning and microphone head jack and a patch for another cable
Dream 2024.08.18 Sun2
4’tunnel stainless steel fun slide under church park lot
from sidewalk construction zone Watermain to Deanna with Asian woman, childhood love interest, though fear of injury, playing
Tube
Fear Worry in slide of colliding bodies when she slides my way from far uphill
fear of cracked skull at high speed injury
Recurring dream, recent, tube
able to see sunlight from far end
curious where tunnel slide starts
explore Deanna end
Started looking too far uphill walk down dirt, clod embankment
Find opening at construction site with Sun shade canopy
Large piles of 20 or 30 sheets of black coarse sandpaper 8 inch wide 6 feet long streen about
Workers would use black sandpaper sheets to smooth out surface of steel tunnel.
No dust was ever seen.
I grabbed a broken or shorter piece of sandpaper, to smooth out part of the steel
As I conceived about going down slide
I
Strategize that we would need to have several people in playground party first to go slowly down the tunnel would be fully clothed with thick clothing so they could test for sharp steel KNURs sand down as necessary
Second person would have less thick clothing, but still some protection, again armed with sandpaper
Third person could slide down without protection
Tube
Dream 2024.08.18 Sun1a
Red brick, patio, concrete, mortar, barefoot
Walking barefoot on wet, fresh concrete mortar over red bricks on patio end of day after construction curious to see
Gently walking over grout mortar extruding up between bricks
Transitions from outside to inside of house, possibly into mom’s bedroom
This is a recurring theme, though, not sexual this time
Missing, physical closeness, warmth, and presence of mom who cares for me and protects me
IRL
My life went to rapidly from having a mother who protected me with a roof over my head and protection, in all other matters
To abject torture abuse, sadistic, gaslighting manipulation by
James Thomas Hanford, a.k.a. Julian Victor Hernandez
JTH a.k.a. JVH
Dream 2024.08.18 Sun1b
Sleep mom bedroom after barefoot mortar
Genealogy, Becky peters
In computer genealogy room encyclopedia set
Encyclopedia page East Coast city and ref#
Dream 2024.08.17 Sat
Sex with mom first ever
In computer genealogy room 1st ever
Complete removal of guilt shame first ever
Since, coded childhood dreams of crawling through tunnel between bathrooms and pool channel underwater, ocean sea, maybe grade school
NightmaresKid
ChildhoodSquareDancHand
KathTuthillKevinJonesHand
ChildhoodTunnelBathroom
ChildhoodTapeArtBoardBW
Childhood bathroom Floor
ChildPooTunlSeaFlorCarrot
ChildhoodFly
ChildhoodRiverCanyonExplr
Childhood Naked School
TeenNoBrakesCar
Childhood
Dream 2024.08.16 Fri
Garden hose and watered the lawn in the center of the city block and corner. Grass city decided to a lot water to keep a hood path across the lawn to keep green a band of Greenway for people to walk across on the block, even if part of the grass died away. There’d be a green band put all the grass with green and the watered That I watered the sidewalk all the plants all the way down the block and I kept walking to the block hearing a very long cartoon house and kept the plant green on the businesses and in front of an Asian woman’s store watering her begonias in gardenias and purple in front of her glass door front. They came up to almost covering her phone number of her business retail behind the glass I could see her Displays on glass shelves of jewelry boxes I kept walking on
Each store water, the purple flowers come up, especially the native flowers that bloomed as the person before had planted, credible stands of native flowers that would attract birds and bees, and the next property, I’d see the same purple flowers that had spread so water, those purple flowers and each Property until finally I got to the
Venue of a nightclub bar
Dream 2024.08.16 Fri
Where a party had been last night or a party was gonna be tonight
So I was helping set up and now I was in the kitchen or back room and they had other refrigerators and there were a couple of drinks, bottles of beer or lemon, lime, spritzer, water, or something refreshing and wedged between a couple of the refrigerators and later they were balloons in clumps weighing around and somebody can make paper mâche out of them
And I was gathering all these brown paper shopping bag, stacking them together on top of them mini fridge save for later thick pile, 1 foot thick of grocery bags, and I could carry them under my left arm, but I was gonna put the hose there too as I walked back Curling the hose of my shoulders blocks to walk back with the hose
Dream 2024.08.16 Fri
DreamRShoulderArthritis
So I strategized in my dream
If if I use my left arm to do all the work of coiling hose over my left shoulder then my right arm and hand could act as a cat for the hose coil passively without straining wire, arthritis, right shoulder then my left arm could do the work of coiling, so I strategize forward and backwards, motions of making the coil that would not upset my arthritis
So now, my chronic right shoulder condition has embedded itself in my dreamworld. This is depressing as heck.
IRLRightShoulderArthritis
Dream 2024.08.14 Wed
Thneed Fluffy Crochet hanging me on wall
I hung on a wall of her room with others present
My right al hooked over my speed rope, hemp support near the ceiling corner where I powerlessly hung as I feverishly attempted to secure my dangerous perch. If I fell, there were three people below me on the couch one was a kid. I would surely injure them and myself yet I was.
I was idli destroying my sweater as it were unfurling my sound fabric magic scarf sleeve two fasten my Persch with my green white beige, three tone textile unraveling my arm, so up my fasten climbing hanging, make sure the station
All while reporting to people below my process
Silly Dr. Seuss situation, cannibalizing my soft, furry costume to so and lash this impromptu harness on the top of the wall up against the corner of the ceiling, hoping to win my race with time to gain security before I fall down, completely testing the strength of the yarn that I was stealing from my costume sleeve too Gather grab crimp and lash around this single run of hemp cage no stronger earth thicker than a standard run of cheap dollar store hemp clothesline twine anchored to the ceiling which I was wrapping around
Here
Both on the macro and the micro I wish I had
IRL
I wish I could visually video movie re-create demonstrate the stream
Hi
Often wish I had video production capability to reiterate, demonstrate, dreamy, fantastic quality of my dreamscapes, which are so vivid, and
I
Ponder, how excellent to create a fun flowing in my life would be
Socially all the people I would enlighten in and attract into my circle, if they could enjoy the thrill of my whimsical, fantastical, creative visionary explorations
Of
My dreamworld, which is in a word
Creative
IRL
When I climbed a rope on the west end of cell space dance floor as I near the top, 2530 feet off the ground, a woman called out from the small crowd and expressed concern for PNB careful
I was some saddened by her lack of confidence in me
I’m an excellent climber
I understood she could not know my skill level
Junior high school we had a very thick climbing rope hanging from the ceiling which was? 30 feet high.
Never
This century or even likely in the last decade, maybe two decades of less century would any school allow kids to do that?
That was extremely dangerous liability
By today’s
CYA cover your arse, fearful liability standards
So
My dream likely pulled from these two events
From these two hanging rope situations, as
That’s just the only source material that makes any sense
Third source could be climbing ropes, outdoors, friends fuck
Dream 2024.08.13 Tue
Woman, slender, spelt, pink dress, sheer, radiant, basking, smiling in my compliment stream in my flow possible mix of two women
IRL
A slender, petite blonde said I’m yours, Grant Green lived Aztec Marin much regret MO’s Grille
Tope Lounge perm closed
I picked her up by her thighs, Eric, tall up in the air with my fuzzy, red, fluffy costume. Then she said.
I’m yours
She is on my list of regrets
I was shy she approached me from a group of four guys frat boys, so I errantly assume she was with them but no. She said.
I’m yours
I could’ve invited her to dance across Grant
Doh!
B woman, BAA I wanted to feed dogs with at Pond PA much regret dated David S Foothill
DREAM
Material as she stood in the desert close in time to wanting to check out this sphere of water reservoir red rock monolith water source up against the canyon wall
She drove an asymmetrical red Honda sleek accordish sexy slender perfectly befitting, her desirable young fit hardbody
I’ve seen her car pulled up to the house from above was asymmetrical and three ways that notch in the hood, headlight bucket, recessed, one side dashboard similar
I mentioned this later, Ashley Bas in my praise, asked if she was checking her fluids, so I was going to help her with that
Dream 2024.08.13 Tue
Southwest Arizona sphere rock structure, Cenote Round spherical water reservoir up against the canyon wall
There had been some historical of it
Water has been said it taste like beer
I can see of getting a very long pipe tube like bamboo, PVC or metal to reach 30 feet to the wet porous side where water was seem to be leaking out to perhaps fetch a sample of water enough to drink or fill a bottle or tap for unknown quantity
WILF also had another huge frisbee far over 175G
Dream Segway into visual demo or shopping comparison of other models available i.e. in retail location. These were huge UFO sauce were looking to X3X size frisbees that were rounded almost half elliptical shape.
IRL
I had brought a white frisbee of brand X75G
To Baker that Macs had given me as he had to and didn’t need to
I had brought it to the beach for a season on a regular basis on the nice days until I’d left it at the Driftwood table bench, one day when DJs and young 20s party was at beach
Buried? Yet later lost by tide
Brand other than whammo TBD
Dream 2024.08.13 Tue a
Frisbee Beach Macs, over 175 g white cloudy beach walk north after stationary start of dream where
Macs was playing frisbee with a girl Kiki nerd like awkward, shy, tomboy country girl, very attractive, playing frisbee softly, laterally perpendicular on the beach over one of the throws was too far and went into the ocean so I threw my frisbee older milkier cloudier version of the same to the couple from where I was Feet wet in the ocean up to their play spot toss while I turned left north
Seeing where their new clean version of frisbee landed into the receiving or coming water ocean
So I ran up to fetch the imperial frisbee, and this began a dream segment of exploring north on the beach very crowded many people and several people later I came across
WILF up north I told him about Macs and woman down south looking to see they were just south of a rather large square building structure on the beach, lunch diner, café or tourist building Square architecture on the beach moderately crowded beach could be 100 people in the quarter-mile we’re looking at as we look south
Pleasant sunny day lots of people happy attractive beach
Dream 2024.08.12 Mon
Car bike, Chase escape run
Macs wanted me to pick him up but he wouldn’t tell me where he was Soma SF last time he was sitting on top of a phone booth at first and Harrison southbound on the south west corner so I was trying to get across Soma to get to him, and I kept asking him where he was, but he wouldn’t tell me Much traffic much difficulty then
Differently I was in my car breaking laws, trying to get out the wrong way up offramp speeding by cars
Tactic
Of just going so fast illegally, the wrong way up off, ramps that I couldn’t be caught pissing everybody off speeding by all the cars going the wrong way on impossible freeway not Soma, but even over ended up going into the bay on a freeway bridge trying to reverse up and over concrete barriers Ended up in the East Bay. Even trying to reverse got an sidewall curved, knowing it would launch me out into the bay and I did it anyway crashed into the mud got stuck.
Segway
Ended up at house for apartment complex in a garage hallway in a car or bike. Trying to maneuver through the apartment complex garage hallway, difficulty turning around my vehicle in the garage hallway got back out into the driveway outside had been running around a little bike monkey bike trainer, bike, balance bike Saw a pile of abandoned bikes, one taller youth bike was missing a pedal so I couldn’t use that was trying to use the bicycle to escape through streets and roads Curves, hills up and down little alleyways, maybe hopping fences barriers between the streets
IRL
I am totally trapped totally screwed. Totally hosed totally fucked.
I have no way out I’m living homeless in my car. I should’ve taken Jamie‘s offer July 2 023 when she had three weeks I could live in her house while I look for Airbnb or a place to stay towards transitioning towards another house which she wanted Eastbay but I told her I wanted SF Baker Beach locate locale didn’t think was realistic one of many schisms or differences I had with Jamie
Her plan
To let me borrow her Honda Odyssey minivan for six months no wait
Her plan was to have me buy a Honda Odyssey or Toyota sienna for 5000 and minivan worth 5K
Drive for six months and then New Year’s January by a sprinter when they’re more available from people give her the minivan worth 5000 in exchange for her services at $50 an hour which is quite reasonable
And I should’ve taken her offer as I was already losing 80,000 to my two lawyers taking advantage of me
4 million to J
Yet
I did not accept Jamie’s offer to come and help me get out of my Mazda
In part
Because I’d have to go to storage in San Carlos two times while once to get my pink slip and then have Jamie drive me back to Palo Alto call the tow company have my car removed for salvage
And
I would have to go to Apple Store that morning to buy an iPhone as my phone had broken
And I was too scared to hurt, too lazy and too resistant to Jamie’s offers
And
IR
The other reasons I was resistance to Jamie’s offers. I needed to have worked out on my teeth for my cavities that were broken from chewing on my glasses for two years after J tortured me, especially in the six month size at his house.
And I had no way to deal with my cats
Not sure how to take cats too San Rafael or Jamie live
I was
So broken I just didn’t know what to do
Just like
I was so broken and J’s house after moving once with bad back and then hurting my back again moving more stuff from my house to J’s garage
When J was torturing me the whole time and I would try to get stuff from my house last night late night, but then I couldn’t shower because J was on my case
My back was so strained
That
Even though James Frangos said I needed to move out of J’s house. My back was broken. I was so unable to move.
Cell
I had a inertia of being stuck at Chase’s house, and then just went downhill and got worse
With so much harassment and torture and refusal to use the so I had stuff in my car stuck in the driveway and the J would not let me put in the garage
Full spectrum torture from J early on May 2 022
Sat Aug 10 2024 FB Disabled Perm no appeal
Sat Aug 10 2024 FB Disabled Perm no appeal
Dream 2024.08.10 Sat
Sat Aug 10 2024 FB Disabled Perm no appeal
Dan’s house from high school up on a hill path from house further to the bus stop which is a nice place on the concrete as you could sit at night and smoke a joint and see everything and be outside and be public private. Nobody’s there you can see the whole world with the top of the hill
Before that
Anastasia, Wagner, or in a car being driven to Dan’s house by somebody’s parents
Then
In a locker room in a showers, taking a shower, trying to find a free towel
Pile of hand towels that were lost, and found her abandon
Wanted to adopt hand towels from a pile that was 2 feet thick like scores of hand towels
So in my dream, I wanted a lot of hand towels
Where
IRL
I lost all my hand towels even though I bought brought 20 30,40 hand towels to J’s house. I didn’t see them in store so I figure I lost them.
And I don’t even count those 24 hand towels in the hundreds of items I’ve lost that J stole my whole life has been disconnected
My whole life has lost
It’s incomprehensible
New battery iPhone 14+
Dream 2024.08.09 Fri 2
Then I went inside 3 gold coins
Not only were the three collars deeply cut in like with the bandsaw or mill but also the three coin at light hair line scratches on surfaces
I showed the coins to the gentleman across the large ceremonial Japanese tea or negotiation banquet table, and as he observed the three coins on the table in front of him, he counted cash. He counted rapidly and then ball to cash up and a wad, and then wrapped out Japanese paper note around it the count was a kin to 11 or one number more than a 10 base number count i.e., 101 in bill as he put down the first ward on the table/chess/storage hi-fi console stereo, system functional table with open top, providing a cubby of space
The Japanese samurai, or leader of negotiations, or representative of power
Said I have to make three cuts. Meaning he needed to take three commissions.
I am proceeded verbally with something to let you know I’m looking for and I think I said 11 which would’ve went 11,000 per ounce or whatever
And at the same time I was knowing in the back, and I said to him
I said, and I have lots more and at that point it became more like I was showing him silver bars of 100 ounce or 10 ounce and
Because
I actually said to him one ounce gold coins, and I might’ve said thousands quantity but
But in my head, I knew that I didn’t not know
I still had them or
If I had lost them to theft or to J
Or to storage
And this was the essence of the dream
And for the first time
A dream was very clear
And close to
And
This is actually the first time in two years that
A dream of gold
Has
Been a trigger that angered me out of my sleep
This is the first time I dream continued full process
Short as it was
The room
Was much like a Japanese samurai room
Or a very wealthy Japanese lord
Being large spaces wooden dark of dark wood, like blacker than mahogany like
Black, dark, wood, and spacious like
5 m x 10 m could be
A living room
Entertainment, room, or dining room
It was his room. I was his guest.
He
Did not respond to my interjection when I interceded with I’m looking for X which again might’ve been 11 K
And I didn’t say much was implied
Could be I was looking for 11 K per coin
IRL
My brain is assaulted daily with staggering inflation. Figures. Today is Friday yesterday, Thursday.
I saw an inflation post describing the $10,000 in 1980 if invested in the S&P 500 would today be worth approximately one.5 mil or 1.3 mil and I see these revolutions every day J bought his house for 60 K
60 K cash in 1970s or 1980 for 1015
Which is now worth formal
I am knowing
More
Rhythmic
That inflation is kicking
And then Jay’s crimes to be in
But
The
IRL I am hiding mentally
20 to 100 times a day I hide in my brain mentally from the reality that J fucked me. It took my wealth.
That I was
$4 million
And now I’m homeless in a car with one to three or four hours of sleep per night average?
Maybe no I don’t often get five hours of sleep
It’s been too hot to fall asleep at midnight
For the last three or four nights, I’ve been going to sleep at 3:04 AM
Last night actually went to sleep at 5 AM
As I had just been blocked by Marty Martel
Who I assume was pissed off
Outing Governor Bill Clinton, for receiving C1 is full of cocaine etc.
IRL my iPhone battery on this $1100 phone is rapidly dying and dies at 60% now it was dying at 50% one day ago
82% battery is rapidly declining and health
Lithium ion battery behavior, very similar to what blue describes on their website
IRL told Heidi via text several days ago that J put me in suicidal mode when he injured me out of the hospital with three vectors of damage to my lungs
Coughing 24, 710 days
Asbestos and air ducts being repaired at Maguire
I’m at medical with emphysema for centimeter tumor and his lungs
Only
Flam in my lungs when I bicycle after fasting for 20 hours, even if I ate zero dairy the day before
81% Battery Fri 8.9 2 hrs per charge
82% Barrery Thu 8.8 2+ hrs per charge
Dream 2024.08.09 Fri 1
Hiding outside students and adults would fetch film or parts from storage room
I would loiter in a cove or outside hallway, access, nook, and then, if an adult or student came by, I would in cower into the doorway, hoping to be seen, but they often would see me as they walked by and I would just try to hide more in the shadows being invisible
I would walk away as the adult went to the door, opened it to access, film, or parts from the storage room
Somewhat similar to rest up on 280 father Sarah or a generic school or church or community building
I had three gold coins in my pocket likely what else maple leaf Second Chance what else Kruger with heavy chrome plated maybe you can say protectors if the coin weight an ounce or two or three, the collar weighed closer to a pound and having it in my pocket for sometime the recallers cut Grooves into each other embarrassingly and as it turns out when I Segway two dream part 2
83% 3 hrs per charge
84% 3 hrs per charged
Dream 2024.08.07 wed
Dreamed of eating a roast beef sandwich first ever dream just raw food
IRL based on the fact that I’m starving I have lost 20 maybe 30 pounds in the last few months the newest change is that I actually went 10 days without getting out of my car without standing up without shopping Hummus and chips a lot yesterday I ate organic oats with old Sabra hummus, the second day in a row for the last two days of the two days before that chips and peanut butter and for the two days before that not much and I’ve been so starving that I’ve been eating one chocolate bar every day just for the fat and because I’m starving I looked in the mirror When I got out five days ago after 10 days in the car, I was pretty much skin and bones not as bad as I was when I was 120 pounds before I started lifting weights and Chase backyard I could hold my middle finger in my thumb together over my wrist and then pull up all the way past my elbow all the way to my shoulder when I weighed 120 pounds at high school at AAA when I was being bullied by Sergio and Peter Bartlett, then in three months, I came 20 pounds from 120 to 140 and then the next three months I get another 20 pounds for 140 to 160. Therefore I gained 40 pounds in six months in high school From 120 to 160 by working out on benchpress curls push-ups situps in high school
Dream 2024.08.03 Sat
Anna bus van driver on lawn up and embankment, whacking shrubs, and trees and cracking windshield up to antique building on a hill with newer wooden frames of windows yet still no glass
I thought to ask people about the history of the building disorder point to strike up Convo
Became
A room within the house, party venue to Longwood Spand across the bed from head to foot and inserted into the wall like a closet coder Dell but I accidentally pulled one out
I had to empty flat cardboard boxes that I stored back in the closet for later had to move some hand towels and washcloths out of the way that were mostly clean, but had just been there. Maybe stocks on the ground knocked over of towels.
Staff tried to help me figure out how to reinsert the dowels into the wall. It turns out one and was a nail into wood, and the other end was a thumbtack into cork.
Lawn party was outside this venue retreat center
Then a top of wall I purged or sat. J was involved as to be there nearby or somewhere problem.
At least now my brain has finally recategorized J as a problem, nuisance, or threat danger that only took couple years
Dream 2024.08.03 Sat
Head out of car window pass side how easy it is to just see other people in cars and how easy it would be if I was on a dance floor just to come near people and gauge their interest
Dream 2024.08.01 MomOJ
I was specifically upset with a lack of free speech in America where my mom would ditch her computer and devote her whole life to making green velour corduroy trinket cozies for Bill Cosby Homecraft TV, show
when free speech never reached her for the last 10 years that Bill Cosby is an SA, who drugs grapes women with Rufies
IRL all of below.
my mom tracked, cared and pursued inane trivial the Hollywood affairs as she aged, was hoodwinked, trapped, mesmerized like all TV watching zombies of USA
Decades of magazines Time People TVGuide
Danielle, steel novels, replaced her decades of reading Michael Crichton books, Alfred Hitchcock and similar spy capers.
Tragic when my parents were both brilliant PhD‘s with colorful accomplished pioneering lives of travel and intrigue.
To see MSM NWO PTP JPS tv ads had transformed a once brilliant, independent scholar, Historian, English major and teacher into a
Functional slave, and factory cog for a Bill Cosby MLM assembly line was just so sad
IRL German Migration Routes of the 1600s across America
my mother gave a complex intricate detailed presentation via translucencies on an opaque projector to the family history center at the church of LDS.
We were raised just lightly protestant.
STRONG GERMAN WORK ETHIC.
IRL my mother became a teacher so she could take her three sons camping every summer for month or weeks just as her parents had done when they loaded all the kids up to the model a or the model T and drove across half of America
IRL my mom became a scout leader so she could teach nuclear fusion to all the scouts and take us on a tour of SLAC to see dinosaur bones and hold Geiger counter over uranium plates at Stanford linear accelerator center
IRL mother created elaborate, artistic chart, diagrams, puzzles, collages, and posters, that she would assemble on a heated Mylar laminating machine to make
And curricula for the students like naked monsters where students would mix and match Colored animals on laminated, paper, due to similar attributes, such as numbers of legs, arms, feet, eyes, noses, or ears
My mother was brilliant, and she worked so hard to make a better life for her kids and her students
IRL My mother is dad was chief neurosurgeon at the mayo clinic in Wisconsin
IRL My mother‘s mom was akin to senior head Nurse at Madison
IRL my mother devoted decades of her life to genealogy mapping out our families 13 generations in America having come from Germany, England, Switzerland
Collecting treasurers documents from Silver Warren Pioneer days as well as vast numbers of our family being involved in chambers of commerce and civil affairs
In dream
I was so upset that my mom got suckered into changing her whole life around, trashing her computer and changing her whole computer room into a workstation where I saw she must’ve spent weeks or a month crafting these trinkets for Bill Cosby
She almost sat ON the cat in the process she stood up to rearrange her workstation of 10 cozies and craft tools and almost squashed cat when she plopped back down. 2 black cats.
END. CUT below. EDIT OUT
Deam my mom was making green velour corduroy cozies for a little stone, toothbrush, pencil stone object. I asked her what that was for and she said it was for Bill Cosby’s TV show craft along our Anne so
I told my mom that Bill Cosby is a SA drugs women put roofies in their drink when they’re not looking, and then he takes advantage of them, and
My mom had rearranged her computer room, which no longer had a computer. Now she set the whole room up to make little green corduroy cozies for stoneware, toothbrush, pencil, brush, looking object, and I asked what are those and she said oh these are.
I walked into my mom‘s computer room and she’s crafting all these green corduroy sleeves cozies for stoneware
As I walked in, my mom had gotten up for a moment and one of the cats had rearranged just by her seat, and my mom plopped down almost sat on the cat. I said mom, please don’t plop you know the cats move around.
I walked into my mom‘s computer room and she’s changed it all around. There’s no computer and instead of a chair at the old computer desk on the north she’s kind of chair on the west facing northwest
This act of Recording dreams, makes me feel like a good honorable likable person which is such the
Antithesis to
My IRL situation of living homeless in my car for 14 months, being depressed and suicidal, because J destroyed my life and gave me no hope of having a future.
I’m proud of who I am, and I feel I would be positively judged for my actions if people knew me, therefore
It is sad at the complete state of loss and pity and homeless untouchable that my life has become
IRL
FB offered me James D Frangos as a friend again yesterday for the second time it is many days and that highly upset me for two reasons
A privacy WTF FB knows JDF me? This has to be the biggest proof that Facebook is snooping on my emails. Honestly, I doubt it is actual verbal speech although it could be that on phone with Jamie how else would we know the JDF is my lawyer or somebody so close to me doesn’t make sense my Facebook connections have absolutely zero to do with JDF or BFD or JV. I have never browsed any of their pages on FB.
B I am very upset about JDF taking 40 K of my money and BDF taking 33K of my money and giving me minimal service and leaving me
In an estate of zero hope.
IRL
Chronic right shoulder arthritis for months now
2024.07.27 @ 57 yr old 1st ever r shoulder pain from even a few strokes of gently softly, attempting masturbating from one position
R LEG
2024.07.28 Facet Joiny Arthropathy X-ray
R LEG numb very little. 95% improvement this week.
S Starving Food supply down diet down
PHLEGM on bike, even on days of fast no dairy
Dream 2024.07.28 Sun 1
Brother Ray deceased has an art reception in SF at Citi College or
J is laying at bed tired or ill at my house and I know he’s dangerous enemy my mom is there. I asked J if he’s going I think he says no. Mom is present and and I am uneasy about whole situation as I hate J and I don’t want him to get any more hooks in to me and my mom is maybe neutral in the situation.
I don’t want him to go I know he’s very dangerous. Threat danger bad person.
Now this is the first dream where my brain has finally slotted J into high danger category
IRL
J tried to get Tom to come to his house one day at my house. I was in the hallway very upset about J at my house also in the high hallway trying to offer Tom to come to his house. Tom was in his room at the time I didn’t know where to be, but was in the hallway because I didn’t want J to get Tom home.
Somehow, as a kid, I was successful in preventing J from molesting Tom. It seems to me that Tom never went to his house and somehow maybe my presence were awkwardness or defense. Tom saved Tom.
I told Tom this while I was being abused living at J’s house 2022 on phone
Tom didn’t thank me or seem to really understand that I tried to save him from being molested by J
DREAM
RAYS art reception is on a large flyer, size of sheet of paper. Parker Gray, magenta non-glossy card stock Square shaped nine or 10 inches
Card had no pictures or images just text and lines at 90° I really wish I could illustrate this. Somehow I don’t have never had an illustration tool other than illustrator decades ago, which took large time and computer memory.
The room number and teacher phone number are in code, broken up in two digit segments that the schools our students understand how to reassemble the phone numbers code this offers privacy on reddish paper with lines and squared off zones for each event or reception teachers phone number And several pairs of two digits.
This text format does not serve. I suppose I need to illustrate at James is either the singer associated with something or the name of the room or the name of the teacher not sure why this keeps coming up Lisa LeBon liked at James
IRL
1 single incident yet primary perception problem I had approximate 2003 2004 2005 with Philippe party peep scene was at BM camp where I ran off behind a water truck to get free shower yet. I was limping and looked gimpy to my crowd because I had that one worst ever horrible wart on my toe that I tried to freeze off with dry ice in Berkeley from Arco gas station at a time when I was dating Eden or Annabelle on my way to burning man
Yet I did not let anybody yet that camp know that I had a work frozen on my toe
Oh, and a significance is they were all cheering for me to catch the truck as I ran off gimping and this is
Similar to
Students in UC Santa Cruz cheered for me as I approached the diving board which
Made me nervous and gave me
PERFORMANCE, ANXIETY INVERSE relationship, where people cheering me on, just made me more nervous and scared made things worse
I did not want the attention
Dream 2024.07.28 Sun 2
I was laying camped out in a makeshift private cubbyhole hiding space may be sleeping space.
at Felipe‘s party play party under a wooden kitchen counter table structure, a huge cube of soap or larder butter or dessert or brick of something that was 15“ x 6“ x 5“ and I moved it carefully and hit it Among the wooden angler non-90° of the table so that nobody else would see it but I could easily grab it from the outside as I reached in, not having to be on the inside where I was laying
Dream 2024.07.28 Sun 3 12x repeat dream hook around Safeway parking lot for dumpster
In this version, I had to avoid a vehicle or dumpster of another employee Safeway as I hooked around counterclockwise, trying to get back and left, and I never got back and left but the dumpster optical I was trying to get around was out so another dumpster which was an attraction
This may be the most repeated dream I have, and maybe 20 times not 12 times.
3x time I hung out loitered in condo parking lights, next-door to kill time and reapproach. Safeway shopping center.
Other times this Morse into actually accessing apartment dumpsters underneath parking garage is as true to form of that complex and or Stanford
Still other times variations I am up and about those six blocks of houses in the hills, exploring either earthquake damage or rain, storm damage or something fascinating
X several other times I have been around the back, which is always morphed, but somewhat true to form similar of different arrangements of delivery bay door, storage of food, accessing different stacks of dated, discarded food product in boxes or bins
X iterations more than the different shopping centers, and different dumpsters and bins
Meaning or source
Suppose this is pretty critical and crucial, because this is a lifetime of being untouchable, or at least different, while at the same time, being different shades of persona non grata at different shopping centers
IRL
I.e. at most, I was not persecuted or only lightly persecuted by some employees, but had good legal ground to stay and be OK as was the norm
Dream 2024.07.28 Sun 4
I was living homeless at Safeway inside the store, laying on the floor, plugged in under an aisle. Tucked under a countertop or shelf and out of the way of other people. I was allowed to be there and/or they weren’t bugging me.
Though I was moving out in a way, or moving around or letting go of that particular spot, and gathering some tools, like a screwdriver and some drillbits, and maybe screws and bolts and little trinkets, and a littleP little pieces for a junk drawer of a toolbox
Next, instead of being on one of files, I was against the back of the store, where one employee very large BBW woman was throwing stuffed animal to a group of people to catch in the air as a prize or and I was turning around to look to see if I could catch it But she didn’t like me so she was trying to throw up for somebody else to catch her. She was trying to beam me in the head with stain me with its purple juice
I was aware of being persona non grata or untouchable also, even in this part of the second part of the dreams sequence for Safeway. I was kind of ducking under and over other objects as that prize flew through the air, and I tried either to catch it or not get hit by it among the six or 12 other people hoping to catch prize
The
Shifted to being slightly outside the Safeway building, going up along modern staircase to a club, where the other kids were waiting to get into the club. I was older and persona non grata or untouchable, simply trying to navigate as to and get two or three, or at the doorway without the other kids, hating me or dissing me.
Dream 2024.07.24 Wed key dream proves brain has not re-categorized J into danger threat nemesis torture abuser
Real estate logo. I asked real estate agent why Delmar SF was only .5 mil was it due to unstable soil, unsafe, slope, hill, slide risk then I showed that label as if it were a two-part label ingredient, US RDAs to
J if this were a pre-2022 normal quarry to my mentor J seeking his advice about a question
I told Zoe again of my dream and or the fact that my brain won’t. Zoe said.
STOCKHOLM SYNDROME
CDL STORAGE SPRINTER SLEEP BETTER HELP TO ORGANIZE GET HOLD OF MY NEEDS
Zoe says these are the things I need to do.
I know I need to do them, but I don’t want to because I’m depressed and I told Zoe
J BROKE ME and I gave her right metaphor for my list like
KEYSTONE OF AN ARCH My BROKEN BACK L5S facet joint Arthropothy J broke @ 16
R leg neuropathy
Phlegm 21 months since Jail. Even days of 20/24 hour fast. When I bike after 6 PM
Even on days of no dairy
Carbon Hydrogel Nano tech? On my
Cribriform plate since Jail covid test 3prerelease
$ Chase. $J. $ chaseTom. $chaseRay
Cats
Body atrophy muscle loss Zoe notes THIN
R shoulder arthritis
TEETH
Mildew Mold. CFS. Brain fog.
I told Zoe since J put me in 16 days of jail I’ve fallen into question about suicide, as obstacles above seem difficult to overcome.
Explained that suicide served me well as a coping mechanism only. Where it allowed me to be an excellent activist, and stand up to oppressors at protests in SF. And.Ca
But NOW I realize I do not want to commit suicide
In other words, it was fine as a coping mechanism to give me a potential way out. Should I ever get into super trouble but deeper thoughts of suicide have shown me that I don’t have the heart for it
So
I’ve been stuck for 21 months lost in limbo between attempting to reconstruct life or give up
Sadly
My poor brain is CPTSD trauma, delaying, putting off decisions or acts
Where in my mode has become finding an up dumpster food for protein, and attempting to get sleep some hours during darkness of 12 to 5
Heat wave
Last two nights didn’t even try to sleep till 3 AM after close door
Oft wake 5/6am airlines overhead
7/8 am backup beepers city vans trucks x3 trucks box an
Squeaky bicycle
CAUGHT IN TRAP no no I have to choose. Unable to choose.
00 / 00 / 00 to visual of my choice box
Longer, I wait more entrenched I get in stuck
J me sitting complacent for 30 years on SSDI where I was paid to sleep and past tim
PUSHING CLOCK = passing time is mostly all I do.
Activism on Facebook is ludicrous, considering my audience is slim due to FB algorithms
Yet
This is my escape, my hiding place in trauma
I am wholy depressed, and dissatisfied with the new poor me.
Sadly, I am still passing time which is
ABSOLUTELY REALISTIC AS I AM LOSING DOLLARS $4M
AGING DECADE PER YEAR
Brain fog capacity, 75%, 80%
As I bike to three spots of dumpster food several times per week
Less
Depending on my power source, I actually lay in the van for 2345 days at a time until I have to charge andBM this is how sad and pitiful my life has become
HALF DEAD I am
2024.07.21 Sun JVH JTH J gave me rotten bananas, so I was upset. I entered a food storage room of his that I was not allowed into to fetch a good bunch of bananas for the coming days and also photograph the fact that he had hundreds of bunches of bananas and half of them were dark, brown, soft and perishing, on the end second fruit that I was also grabbing may have been lemons or
Then also noticed on the carpet in that double upstairs room that he had many short wave radios on the ground. All turned on to the same frequency, and I recognize the brand as one cobra or other brand that he had stolen from me later move out from garage. double room, upstairs glass partition
Dream 2024.07.21 Sun JVH JTH J
I asked Damon whether he’d been molested by J and he didn’t not answer directly, but I could see that he was hiding something and we knew the answer was yes
The week before J molested Damon, J told Damon they were going to have a special meeting
This conversation was upstairs on my upper patio around a ping-pong table
Damon and dream had blonde hair radiating straight out from the top center of his scalp many inches all around except not covering his forehead
Real Damon lived six or eight houses up on the left-hand side and had a sunken living room entertainment area within a split level to story house. No connection.
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